The U7/U8 St. Roberts Rumbles defeated the pathetic MOQ Sounders today 7-0. The MOQ Sounders goal differential is now (-27) or 4 - 31 in five games. As a coach, I should be sacked. Unfortunately, I think that I might be the best we got. So, I just need to sack up and keep on going.
Here are a couple of my issues. So encouragement or advice is welcome on this one.
I started saying Forward/Striker, Midfielder (x2), Defender, Goalie (1-2-1) at the beginning of last year. So far we are 0-11 in this formation. Should I move to a 3-1 or a 2-2? Play without midfielders and very specific roles for each player to create spacing - so everyone gets a box.
Second, simple directions seem beyond my team. I have now spent significant practice time and tell the kids (and I am right next to them because I am also the referee) before every goal kick. Do not kick the ball in the middle of the field. And yet, again today - we had 2 goals against thanks to goal kicks that were probably kicked five feet in front of the goalie into the middle of the field where St. Bob's grabbed the ball and kicked the ball right in. Now should I simply a) simply be quiet - no direction at all that may mean a 20 goal defeat, but so be it, b)pull the goalie if they kick it in the middle of the field - meaning that I may be out of goalies by half-time, c) keep on swimming by telling them and just sort of recognizing that they are a group of 7 year olds with limited retention abilities (salient points of fact will slip out of their minds in under one second).
Third, after being scored upon and asked by my goalie - do I get to kick it? Knowing that this is not the first time or even the 21st time that we have been scored upon this year, should I tell them: a) yes - everyone is on offense, we need to go for broke and make up some goals here, b) no - I am sorry but you just allowed in the worst goal that I have ever witnessed as a coach or player - including the Mike Knust daisy picking goal, or c) be a good sport and ask them - what just happened? Kid: "uh...they scored a goal." So then what happens next? Kid: "uh...I kick it." No, actually we get a kickoff. Kid: "Oh good, can I kick it?" Uh, no - we're going to let our striker kick it off.
Fourth, today we had nine timeouts to tie shoes. Should I a) John Wooden them and start every practice and game with a sock putting on, shinguard, second sock, shoes putting on session? Or should I b) make them all tie their shoes before they can have treats after the end of the game? Or c) should I simply tell them to play without shoes? Or d) give up and secretly hope someone falls and creates a twister-esque pile up?
Fifth, when I am coaching an away game should I tell the other coach who asks me to ref to a) screw off, b) take my whistle and blow it, c) that I would be happy to or d) call the league office and force them to send the other team to forfeit the game (thus making the environment right for a potential first career victory for the MOQ Sounders).
Just asking for some help here. Anything would be useful.
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